Well, it’s over. Final. Done.
Although I left him in November it still feels strange to me to know that I’m not married anymore. Like even though I’ve been away from him, and he hurt me, and I never want to go back to him – I still feel like we have this bond. Like we’re still connected somehow.
My emotions have really been all over the place lately.
I think the finalization of it all has just sort of triggered some ups and downs. On one hand I’m excited to be single again, to find a fun roommate, to have a much calmer and cleaner home, to go out, and to venture into the world of dating again. Yet the shock of all of this change just brings me down sometimes.
I’m moving on though and I’m starting over. I’m safe, I’m healthy, and eventually, I hope I can really be happy again. For now I’ll tough it out through these ups and downs but I know in time I’ll feel much more normal.
I think this is actually the point at which I’m going to stop writing this specific blog. The title of it poses a question – and I’ve already answered it. I’ll still keep writing, but I’m not going to write anonymously anymore. I have no reason to hide anymore, and its liberating to be able to share my stories with those who actually know me. But for those of you – you kind strangers – who stopped by and shared your encouragement with me, I want to say that I appreciate you. Your words made a difference and they helped me get by.
Maybe I’ll even see a few of you around the blogosphere – but for now, goodbye, and thank you.